I Wish You Were Her
by KitsuneandNaruto
Summary: Matt, the boy who could have any girl he ever wanted. The boy who was at the top of the popularity scale. The boy in the stripped shirt and Goggles. Has found someone...exactly like him, only different. She isn't like the other girls. Matt learn a lesson.


"This morning was so weird, Mells."

"Yeah, I heard Hillary broke up with you. What is this one... fifteen? You would think girls would learn."

"Not that, there was some other girl sitting beside the river."

"You didn't know who it was? Amazing, one girl you've never met."

"That's beside the point. She was wearing stripes."

"So?"

"Boots too."  
>"Amazing."<p>

"And… goggles."

"…You think she's stalking you?"

"I don't think so. I've never seen her around."

"Whatever, we better hurry or we'll be late for first period." Mello walked for the doors and I slowly followed. Mello was a nickname everyone used and Mells was something only I was allowed to call him. Everyone calls me Matt, but that's a nickname too. Hey, it's a lot better than Mail. So as I walked toward the door I heard wheels spinning furiously and I turned around. It was the same girl, goggles pulled down, ginger hair pulled back in a messy makeshift bun, oversized striped shirt flying in the wind, and her messenger bag thrown over her shoulder.

I guess she didn't want to be late for the first day of school.

I hurried to my assigned locker and opened it. I threw in my stuff and took what I might need. Pulling the crumpled schedule out of my back pocket I looked to see what class was first. Walking to the class I sat in a chair in the back. It was your average class. Teacher's pets in the front, average kids in the middle, and people who could care less in the back. I was smart; I just didn't pay a ton of attention in class. I picked up what the teacher was talking about no problem, but as far as doing class work, forget it. Therefore my grades were average. B's and C's. Mello did everything to be the best because he was competing against some other kid for the title of best in the class.

I stretched my legs out under the desk and kicked one over the other. I was in my usual get up. Jeans, boots, black and white striped shirt, and my favorite goggles. They were up on my head, because I wasn't allowed to have them on in the school building. That girl was concerning because she was wearing almost exactly what I was. Her shirt was short sleeved and the stripes were blue and white instead of black. Her goggles were purple with orange lenses and her jeans were obviously girl's jeans. I think. I closed my eyes to think and looked briefly to see the teacher walk in. I shut them again when he started to talk and sat there thinking. He was going on about how he wanted to start out with a project that would require partners. What was this class again? Oh yeah, history. What were we learning about? I opened my eyes to look at the board, caught the word Shakespeare and closed them again. I didn't care who I got.

I turned around with the rest of the class to see who had just thrown open the door, and was panting heavily. It was the same girl I had seen before. She was bent over trying to catch her breath. Once she could almost breath she walked up, handed the teacher a late slip and sat down in the only available seat, right next to me. I glanced at her once or twice but she never looked at me.

"So you're Carter?" She nodded. "Welcome to our school." She smiled a little to thank him and picked up her pencil. She began to twirl it in her fingers, and she stared on as the teacher droned on about this project.

A whole class of droning about a project and then quickly handing us a syllabus and telling us we needed to bring it back with a guardian's signature. Not very eventful. The rest of the day was boring with a capital B. The first day is the one that no one likes at all. All of my classes nearly put me to sleep and I was ready to get home and do something productive. Playing videogames is productive! I would have, if I hadn't been driving past the same river I had this morning. She was there again. I pulled to the side and parked. I watched her like this for a while. She must have noticed me because I looked away for a second and when I glanced back she was getting up. She walked off and I sat there for a bit longer just staring at the spot where she was. I nearly jumped out of my skin when there was a knock on the passenger's side window. I whipped around and she was standing there. She motioned for me to roll the window down and I did.

"You've been parked here for a while. Do you always watch people when they sit beside the river?" She seemed almost amused and now that I got a good look at her she wasn't wearing any make-up. Her eyes were brown and she was leaning on my car.

"No."

"If you want you can join me. I was planning to feed the ducks with some old crackers. It's pretty fun, and they're nice if you don't scare them."

"No, I have to get going." I went to put my car in gear when she opened the door and sat down. She looked around before looking at me and smiling.

"To go where?"

"Home."

"To what?"

"Why did you…?" I couldn't even finish the sentence. She was sitting there as if it was totally normal to be sitting there.

"Matt, right?" I nodded slowly. "I got a lot of people come up to me and ask why I was copying you. I didn't mean to, this is just what I wear. Pretty much all of them were girls and they sounded pretty peeved. So, no hard feelings about the clothes?" She held her hand out to me and I looked from her hand to her face. I looked hard at her trying to find the tiniest bit of sarcasm or anything. There was total sincerity. I nodded and carefully shook her hand.

She smiled and turned to exit the car. She leaned against the door again and stuck her head in to say something else. She almost said it, before smiling again and turning to walk off. She walked behind the car and I watched her so I wouldn't hit her. She swung a leg over her bike and rode off winking at me as she passed by. Her backside wasn't resting on the seat and I couldn't help but think that she looked like a professional cyclist. She disappeared down a street and I sighed.

"Weird girl." I put the car in drive and pulled out. I was hungry and when I looked at the radio clock it was four. I groaned. I must have been sitting there longer than I thought.

I was sitting in the parking lot of BK. I didn't have a lot on me, so a small bag of fries was all I got. I turned the radio on and began to munch on the fries. Then someone knocked on the window and I looked over. It was the same girl as before. I sighed and rolled the window down. I was going to ask her a question, but she beat me to it.

"Is this your dinner?" She looked up at me with eyes that didn't believe what she saw. They almost looked concerned.

"Are you stalking me?" She shook her head, which tore some strands out of her bun a bit.

"Convenience of location I suppose. You have to be kidding, someone like you can't possibly eat only this and be content."

"This is fine." Why did she care so much? Was the irony of us having a similar wardrobe giving her the impression we were friends?

"One bag of kiddie fries does not a full meal make." She shook her head before her eyes lit up and she smiled. "You should come have dinner with my dad and me! He still makes enough for three, so you won't be imposing. What do you say, will you come?"

"I really-"

"Come on Matt." I looked up to her and she had that look. The kind of look that says 'I know you're only denying because you're trying to be a gentleman, but I really know you want to'. "We're having spaghetti." She dragged the word spaghetti out to practically sing it. She was trying to get me to come. But I didn't know her. I wasn't even sure I caught her name this morning.

"Look, we don't even know each other-"

"So?" She looked at me practically asking if it really mattered. "Call it… southern hospitality."

"Southern… hospitality?" She couldn't possibly… she didn't even have an accent.

"I lived in a small town where you knew everyone's name and people left their doors unlocked with the keys on the dash in case someone needed it. It's in my blood to be nice to everyone." She kind of half smiled at me. Okay, so I might be good with girls, heck I could have any girl I wanted! But in that moment, I knew she wasn't like those other girls. She didn't want me in her bed, she wanted me at her dinner table. I barely knew her and she was opening her home up to me.

"But won't your dad be impositioned?"

"No, I already called him and told him that I was bringing you home." She called her dad before she even asked me? "Well come on, I'll direct you." She opened the door and sat in the passenger's seat for the second time that day. I sighed and started the car.

"Right or left?"

"Right." I turned and then she shouted. "My bag! I left it back there!" I stopped and she jumped out and ran back to the door. She picked up the messenger bag and sprinted back to the car door which she left open. "Okay, I'm sorry."

"It's alright."

"Once you get up to this road take another right." I followed her directions and about the fourth house down the road she told me to pull in. A man about in his forties with black hair opened the door and she opened the door of the car, grabbed her bag and ran up the steps. I slowly got out and a got a little smirk from her father.

"Oh, daddy this is Matt. Matt, this is my dad."

"It's nice to meet you, son." This man did have an accent and I just nodded dumbly before shaking his hand. He turned to walk in and I followed him in. The house wasn't decorated much, but what was there looked really homey and… southern. I can't explain why, but if I didn't hear the southern accent, I could have guessed just by looking at the living room.

"This is, uh, a nice look."

"So I see Carter convinced you to come. What did she say to you?" Her father looked over his shoulder while he stirred the pasta.

"I don't know. The southern hospitality thing, I guess." He chuckled and shook his head.

"I see. Dinner's almost ready, so y'all better get to the table."

"Comin' daddy!" Carter, as I knew her name now, ran down the hall from somewhere. I guess she went to her room because her boots were off and her bag was gone. Her hair was now braided over her shoulder. It was pretty long; almost touching her hip and looked well taken care of. She also took off her goggles. This struck me as a bit odd. I never took my goggles off for much of anything. I looked at her, trying to ask if I should take off my things too.

"You can set your boots by the door, son. Carter, show'im where he can wash his hands, would you?" She nodded and looked over to wait for me to finish with my foot wear. I noticed while I was bent over working on taking them off that she was barefoot and around her right ankle she had a little anklet with a charm on it. It was half of a heart and it was gold plated. As soon as I finished and stood back up she turned to walk back down the hall. I hesitated before following her. She turned into a little bathroom and turned the light on.

"There you are. Hot and cold are labeled and the soap bar is right there." She smiled at me again and I sort of half smiled back. She walked out and I looked in the mirror. What was I thinking? Where was she going to take this? Out of the corner of my eye I catch a picture taped to the medicine cabinet. I looked at it and saw Carter, goggles pulled over her eyes, in a wet tee-shirt with an orange bathing suit top underneath, clinging to a dog. And it was a big dog. German Shepard, I think. She had on shorts and she was sitting on a sidewalk wet from whatever had gotten her wet. She looked, happy.

"I haven't seen a dog anywhere." I looked down and turned the water on scrubbing my hands. I dried my hands and stepped out shutting the light off. I didn't see Carter waiting for me, so I carefully took off my goggles too. I walked back out to see that the table was set. I nonchalantly walked over to my boots and dropped my goggles down so they were hidden inside one of them. I walked over to the table and looked around. I didn't know what to do. We never ate together at a table at my home, so I didn't know how this worked. Believe it or not, this was the first ever time I'd been in a girl's house. My relationships were strictly pleasure, nothing serious.

"Alright, come and get it!" Carter hopped over to the stove and took a plate. She thanked her father and walked away to sit down. I just watched her walk toward me. She gave me a weird look and stepped past me.

"Well, go on." She gently kicked me to get me moving and when I looked back in confusion she just gestured to go. So I carefully walked up and her father handed me a plate piled so high with pasta I thought I was dreaming. I didn't know it was possible for that much to fit on one plate. I must have had a surprised stare because he chuckled once before setting a hand on my shoulder.

"You look at it like you've never eaten food before." I laugh a little too and move to walk back to the table. This posed another problem. I didn't know where to sit, and Carter wasn't at the table. Where did she go? I gently set down my plate across from her place and looked at it unsure.

"Sit down, Matt." I looked behind me to find her standing there with cans of Coca-Cola and looking at me kind of weird. I was going to say something, but I just sat down and she walked around the table setting a can at every person's place. Her father came out from the kitchen and took his place. Things were quiet for a little bit. I carefully picked up the fork next to my plate, still a little uncomfortable.

"So how was your first day of school youngsters?"

"Not very eventful, we got syllabuses and were told what the classes were. The teachers seemed to like me." Carter looked at her dad and smiled even though she had spaghetti on her fork. He nodded and turned to me. Oh god, he wanted me to answer too?

"Uh, it was alright. We just went over what the classes were about and not much else." He just nodded and continued with his food.

"It's nice to see that Carter made a friend." This stopped me short. A friend that was a girl, what a novel idea. The only problem was, she was new, and people thought she was copying me. That was not a good mix.

It had been a whole month and not much had changed. If you count the dirty looks and whispers about Carter nothing. She dressed that same way every day, and no matter how many times she told people she wasn't copying me, I was the only one that believed her. A lot of the girls were upset that I was being kind to her. They called her an attention seeker and told me I shouldn't talk to her. Maybe she did have my attention sometimes, but she never struck me as the type that would go out of her way to cling to me. For the most part, we were separated. She sat with me and Mello at lunch, along with the lovely girl who had the honor of being on my arm that day. Now, maybe Mello didn't like girls, but he seemed to like having her around a lot more than the other girls that would be there. She didn't talk to him unless he spoke to her, and he respected her for that. I might have joined her once or twice to feed old crackers to the ducks at the river. Needless to say, the ladies around were jealous and it was making me un-easy. People were not looking at me the same. My popularity was dropping. Don't get me wrong, I went through a dip like this when I became friends with Mello, but this was more dramatic. Mello was just gay but Carter was a threat.

I had seen her defend herself against some guys when they tried to rough her up. She had them running off before I even reached her. I guess she knows her way around a fist. I was a little surprised.

"Matt, are you alright? You're starring off into space." I focused on Carter's face and she smiles, but looked a bit concerned. I had driven her to her house because it was raining, and I was going to attempt to break the news to her. If I didn't want my life to end, I couldn't see her anymore.

"Yeah, do you have all your things?" I was looking around solemnly and I think she caught this.

"Yeah, thanks again, Matt." She went to get out and I opened my door to follow her. She turned around quickly to see what was going on.

"Carter I have something to tell you." She walked back over to me, looking up at me through the rain.

"What is it?"

"I can't be around you anymore. People are talking and it isn't making things any better the longer we're friends." At first she didn't react at all. After about five seconds disbelief registered on her face. After that, it was hurt, and finally anger.

"So just because all those other popular people don't like me, suddenly you aren't allowed to choose your friends!"

"That's not it, I-"

"No! That's exactly what it is!" She stepped forward and grabbed me by the shirt. "If you never wanted to be around me, then you should have told me up front instead of dragging me along. Don't worry, you won't have to deal with me ever again." Then she punched me. Hard. Right in the gut. Then she ran inside. I could have sworn I heard a sob before the door slammed. I picked myself up off the ground and got back into the car. I put it in reverse and backed out of the drive.

The next few days, I didn't see Carter. Someone who looked like her came to school, but she was wearing converse, a skirt, and feminine tops. She was making a point to avoid stripes, goggles, and boots altogether. She wasn't going to associate herself with me. She still spoke to Mello occasionally, but she didn't sit with us at lunch. She sat by herself if she was in the cafeteria at all. I felt guilty, and I wasn't sure why.

About a week after I had told her the news, I was walking into school and I passed by the orchestra room. I heard a violin being played and thought I'd peek in to see who it was. They were pretty good. So I looked in the little window and I saw Carter sitting in a chair, with a music stand in front of her. She had just taken the violin from under her chin and the orchestra conductor was applauding her. I walked away.

In first period, she wasn't in the class; I found out later she had transferred classes and was taking history later in the day, where her study hall was originally. She was really making an effort to avoid me. She never even spared me a look when I did see her around.

My popularity was on the rise again, but I wasn't happy. I was writing a little note to a girl I was keeping while she was on a transfer program. It was lunch time and Mello was sitting across from me.

"You already know Carter's mad at you. I don't have to tell you." He was right. I folded the note up and put it in the envelope. I sealed it and looked up to glare at him.

"I know she's mad at me, but it was for the best."

"The best of what, your popularity isn't going to matter when you get out of school. You'll probably never see most of these girls ever again." He was right about that too.

"Where is she?"

"In the orchestra room, practicing and talking to the orchestra conductor. You know, you can't just patch things up and pretend this never happened, she's really pissed. She isn't going to forgive you so easily, you really hurt her. I thought that maybe she would get over it, but she was really upset." He was right… again. "You know she didn't deserve it."

"So now I'm the bad guy?"

"Now? Matt she was nothing but nice to you! You talked to her for, what, twenty minutes? And she invited you into her house based on the simple fact that you were eating fries for your dinner! You know just as well, if not better, that none of those other bitches out there would do that for you. All they want is your dick! She liked you because you were nice to her, and you totally shattered that." Mello picked up his things and went to throw them away. I knew I made a mistake. I wanted to take it back, but I was afraid she wouldn't accept my apology. I hadn't even taken the time to know her. I didn't know she played the violin. Or, maybe she called it a fiddle.

I was driving around. I didn't even know why I chose to drive around at seven thirty at night, but my mind would not stop. I got a note back from the girl. It had a picture of her flipping me the bird and the note basically consisted of her calling me every bad name in the book. She sent my note back. It was taped together crudely and she had circled the parts that set her off. I meant to write 'I wish you were here', but instead I wrote 'I wish you were her'. On top of that, I went on to talk about how I loved the way she blinked at me with those brown eyes. The girl's eyes were blue. I also talked about the way that her messy buns were cute. She never wore buns. And to top it all off, at the bottom, I wrote, 'I love you Carter'. I was trying to find serenity. I didn't care that I didn't have the girl under my charm anymore. I was freaking out because I realized what I wrote.

I had confessed my love for Carter.

I pulled into the drive. I had to make this right and even if she wouldn't forgive me, she had to know how I felt. I had to confess face to face.

I walked up the steps and rang the doorbell. The door opened and when I looked up I couldn't help myself. I immediately pulled her into a hug. She was standing there in a large shirt and sleep shorts, and she didn't move. I didn't know that I had started crying until she let out an 'oh'.

"Matt…" She sighed and wrapped her arms around my neck. "What's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Matt-"

"Carter, I don't know what it is you did, but you worked your way into my heart. I didn't realize how much I loved you until you were gone. I was so stupid."

"No you weren't. You didn't know until now." I could tell she was smiling. I pulled away to look at her. She smiled at me… with those brown eyes. "I knew the first time I saw you."

"I think I did too. I just denied it." She was different. She wanted me around to cherish and sit by. She didn't want a one night stand and then a few smiles every so often. I realized all I was looking for, was the girl that wouldn't use me. I was looking for someone who wanted a serious relationship; one who I could look at and I would know she was meant for me. Carter even dressed the same as me. I looked her in the eyes and she smiled. She pulled my goggles over my eyes and pulled hers over hers. She smiled at me and her cheeks turned the cutest shade of pink. I leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. She laughed and pulled me into another hug, resting her head against my chest.

"All I need is your heartbeat, cowpoke." I smiled at this. She was so weird. It must be southern thing.

Carter was back. She wore goggles, striped shirts and boots again, and she was adorable. The day I walked into school with her on my arm, there was talk. She didn't notice it and continued to smile. Mello was smug about the whole thing muttering things like 'soul mates' and 'I knew it' all the time. Carter told me everything about herself. She had picked up the instrument at the age of ten and loved the music it made. She learned different songs and soon enough, she was front chair in her old school. The clothes that she wore now had been purely coincidental, because she didn't want to announce that she was from the south. She figured that if she was coming to a city, she might as well dress like someone might. The goggles had been a gift from her mother, who rode horses on dusty trails. They were an old pair and they meant the world to Carter. Her mother had passed away in a terrible accident on a ranch that they were watching. The cows were spooked by something and stampeded. Trying to find out what happened; her mother went to look and couldn't get out of the way before the hooves crushed nearly every bone in her body. She hung on long enough to get to the hospital, but died an hour after saying her final goodbye to her loving family. Carter was heartbroken. As soon as her father was offered and opportunity for a better paying job, they moved. Carter didn't leave behind much. She had friends, but she wasn't terribly missed.

Carter was at the bottom of the school food chain. But she didn't care.

I found out that Carter was in touch with the child that most of us had lost. She was always going on and on about things that never seemed to make much sense. She dragged me into infinite games she made up and even showed me the best way to hold a toad so it wouldn't spook and pee all over you.

That was… fun. Note my sarcasm.

She played her violin for only me sometimes and even attempted to show me how to read music. I may not be a music god, but I can tell the difference between an A note and an E note. Sort of.

One thing I will never forget is the words her father said to me the night of prom.

"I like you, boy. Carter likes you, and she trusts you. I don't mind you takin' her out to a dance… but try anything funny an' I'll show you how we southern dad's care for our babies."

I was terrified, but somehow I could tell he knew that wouldn't be a problem. Carter wasn't like the other girls. She was innocent and beautiful to me. Everyone else may not like her, but if they got a chance to look through my eyes, they could see what was so amazing. She said the most philosophical thing to me just last week.

"You know… god gave us two eyes to see, two ears to hear, and two feet to walk… but he only gave us one heart. He gave us sets of things so we could listen a lot, look a ton, and walk for miles, and he only gave us the opportunity to truly love, only once. That one time that you look at a person and they look at you, you should know, and if you don't… it's not the right thing."

"But what if the person you love doesn't love you back?"

"Then it's not true love. …We knew."

Like I said, philosophical. There was a certain feeling that was present when she was around. I can't tell you what it is, but she said that if the love is true both people should feel that thing.

Her bedroom was a common stop after the relationship was official. I think her dad knew, because one time he actually knocked on the door and shouted in.

"You two makin' love or can I say goodnight to my daughter?" It seemed pretty light hearted and I actually laughed at it. After only a week of our relationship, I felt like part of her family.

Who knows, I might get inducted soon. Best wishes, right!


End file.
